Thank you so much for your letter. I am glad you have decided to keep an honest and open communication with me. After all, we have been together now for almost 10 years and the money I have spent in interest to our relationship couldn't possibly be measured any more.

I am sad to hear that the economic environment has affected you, I feel awful for you. I can't even imagine how horrible it must be for you. I really felt bad when I heard your CEO, Fairbanks, got hit with a million dollar loss in compensations and only received $17 million in stock options.

I know government assistance is hard to survive on. You only got $3.56 billion in November and you didn't even get food stamps. Holy crap!! They didn't make you stand in line with the welfare folks, did they? I couldn't bear to know you had to slum with the poor.

And of course I would love to help out. I care about you just as much as you care about me, so please go ahead and tack on that 24.9% variable rate if you think it will help you. And of course tack on that annual 29.4% floating above the prime rate. I love that...I think that will really get you out of the hole. I am so happy you have found a way to pass the buck and lean on me. After all you helped me in tough times, too. Remember when I lost my job and needed to float groceries and my electric bill on your tab for a few months.

What would I do without you?

I promise I will send out this letter to all my friends to spread the word.

Sincerely,

Consumer 8721